The horizon lays ahead of me. It’s open, exciting, yet at the same time unknown. Heading into another big life change brings a lot of transitions and emotions, as well as closing doors behind me. It sure feels good, but it’s also scary at the same time.
Lately life has had a lot of change and transition. And I’ve gotta be honest that the past few weeks have been tough. Lots of new things to face, emotions to sort through, conquer and then move on to something else. There’s been no time to just stop and breathe and process when needed. Due to the chaos of life, I’ve been feeling like I’ve been on auto pilot checking stuff off my list.
This past weekend I got hit hard with a lot of stuff. All at once. Nothing that I can’t handle over time, but sometimes we just have life stuff we have to work through. And it always seems to hit at the same time. Too many emotions, too much stress and too many disappointments to dig through. Anyone else been there?
Come Monday night I felt like it was sure more than I could handle. Thank God for family and friends who are always there for a hug and to ensure me it’s going to be okay.
I got home from playing sand volleyball Monday night and was starving from not really eating dinner. I decided to make myself a shake, so I poured in the milk and watched as it leaked all over the counter, as I had forgotten to put the inside part at the bottom of the glass pitcher. It reminded me of my current life with everything seeming to just pour all over.
I cleaned it up and picked up the pitcher to wipe off the bottom. In the process, I watched the pitcher slip out of my hands and shatter. Everywhere.
I stood in my kitchen in shock as the pieces in front of me seemed so reminiscent of life at the moment. Although not earth shattering (or pitcher shattering), I was struggling and getting hit with everything all at once. And I was left to feel like I was in a lot of pieces waiting to be picked up.
As I stared at the glass, this verse popped into my head: “Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope” (Romans 5:3-4 NIV).
And in that moment, I was reminded that when it comes down to it, sometimes you have to break to transform and come out even better than you were before. God makes it clear that our character is built in the tough times, and I say Amen to that!
Sometimes everything has to fall apart before it can be put back together. I know I’ve experienced that in life before, and once again, I know that it will be just fine. My resiliency is intact, and even though I may feel like I am breaking apart, my shatterproof spirit and drive just won’t give up.
So here’s to new beginnings!